And it came to pass that my heart was heavy, and I knew not the remedy. So I said unto the Lord, “Lord, my joy is gone from me. For I no longer wish to do battle with the Philistines in the Land of Brooklyn whereto, lo, these thirty years, have I sojourned. And the College that lieth in the Land of Brooklyn hath offered me an early-retirement incentive, and I am sorely tempted, Lord, to accept this bounty. But also, I am afraid, for to some, retirement is a blessing, but to others, it is a curse. And I know not what to do. Lord, send me a sign.” But the Lord spake not.
And on the next day in the College that lieth in the Land of Brooklyn, the Pharaoh of the Department of English calleth me into his chamber. And the Pharaoh sayeth unto me, “Lo, Horwich, thy disciples have fallen away from thee, and I hereby cancelleth thy Shakespeare elective for insufficient enrollment. And in its stead, I give thee this choice: thou mayst teach English 1: Fundamentals of Composition, or, if thou wilt, thou mayst teach English 0.4: Fundamentals of Composition (Remedial). How chooseth thou?”
And the Pharaoh’s words were like a black cloud sweeping over a starry sky, and I knew despair, for teaching Fundamentals of Composition is as eating thistles, but teaching Fundamentals of Composition (Remedial) is as eating thistles with tares. And then at once, a thought came unto me: that this was the sign from God for which I had prayed. And my heart leapt up, and I accepted the early retirement incentive, effective January 30th, 1998. And my household rejoiceth, and all our hearts are full.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Yea, verily, and the sheep in the fields of East Hampton now bleat with glee, for Brooklyn's bardic shepard has come to reside in our green and sandy pastures.
ReplyDeleteBaaaa!
Josh Sheepstone
oops - I mean shepherd - sorry English teacher....
ReplyDeleteRemorseful Josh
I have no doubt that you considered your students at Brooklyn College "Philistines." I was one of your students. I remember you as a pretentious mediocrity.
ReplyDeletewhat a great comment on retirement!
ReplyDeletegood for you!!!!!!!!!!!!
W.J.Reeves
Dear Professor Horwich,
ReplyDeleteI had you for a Masters Shakespeare course back in 1993. You are one of the best professors I ever had. I have been teaching English at the NYCDOE for 25 years. Your knowledge has helped many students over the years. One of the gems that I learned from you is to write the introduction last. That was particicularly helpful for ESL students who are likely to have a less than stellar introduction. If they write it first, then the rest of the essay usually unravels like a worn out sleeve. However, I can use a template to have them write most of the essay, then let them put a personal touch on the introduction which they write last. They need the template for structure, organization and transitions. Any student who gave you a bad review is clueless. You would have made a great composition teacher. I hope you are enjoying retirement.
Sincerely,
Hugh Power
I meant particularly.
ReplyDeleteI meant particularly.
ReplyDeleteDear Professor Horwich,
ReplyDeleteI had you for a Masters Shakespeare course back in 1993. You are one of the best professors I ever had. I have been teaching English at the NYCDOE for 25 years. Your knowledge has helped many students over the years. One of the gems that I learned from you is to write the introduction last. That was particicularly helpful for ESL students who are likely to have a less than stellar introduction. If they write it first, then the rest of the essay usually unravels like a worn out sleeve. However, I can use a template to have them write most of the essay, then let them put a personal touch on the introduction which they write last. They need the template for structure, organization and transitions. Any student who gave you a bad review is clueless. You would have made a great composition teacher. I hope you are enjoying retirement.
Sincerely,
Hugh Power